Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Happy, Happy, Happy!

Listening to: Fearless by Taylor Swift

Yeah, sorry I haven't written anything in a while, had all sorts of dramas witht the internet connection, got lots to share :D



WARNING: If mushy, lovey-dovey type stuff bores you than you may not want to read this xD

Me and Daniel are going out :). He asked me on Thursday, and I've been on a sort of high ever since. We went to the movies yesterday wiith some other friends - another couple, and 3 singles. Saw Fired Up, funniest movie I've seen in ages!! Naturally, I sat next to Daniel. At first we just sat there and watched the movie, but we soon followed the lead of the other couple and pulled up the armrest so that we could sit closer together. He knows that I'm not really comfortable with the whole boyfriend/girlfriend thing yet, so he left it like that for a bit and then he held my hand :). It felt sort of weird, but absolutely amazing at the same time. He is so sweet, every time he did something he would whisper in my ear, just to make sure I was OK with it. He kept hold of my hand for pretty much the whole movie :).

He kept whispering stuff to me at random times all through the movie, so I had to work really hard to pay attention to it. My mind (and my eyes) really wanted to focus just on him, but that would have been a waste of $10. Most of the money on food was wasted too, because I was too interested in him to feel even the slightest bit hungry. At first the stuff he said was mostly about the movie, but it slowly drifted to me and him. Eventually he said "I love you Tegan" and kissed me on the cheek. The butterflies in my stomach (which had been there ever since he 1st held my hand) errupted into some kind of butterfly frenzy at that point, and I couldn't keep the smile off my face. He kissed me a few more times during the movie (always on the cheek), and I really, REALLY liked it, even though a couple of the girls with us kept laughing, which sort of spoiled the moment.

As the credits rolled, he told me that he loves me again, and asked if I wanted to hold his hand walking out of the cinema. I said yes and we did, but only partway because my mum was waiting there and I don't want her to know about us just yet. I love him, and I hate keeping things from my family, but I just want a bit longer to enjoy this before letting them in on it.

First day back at school today. Daniel didn't catch the bus with me like he said he would, but everything else was awesome! Even my least favourite class (well, I like the class but not the teacher) Agriculture was good! We had an assembly today, so only had to go to half of S&E. Daniel held my hand for a second or so while we were walking there, but then we saw our science teacher so he let go :(. Stupid Mr M, always ruins everything. Assembly was boring as usual, just comments on behaviour and uniforms.

I was hoping for a change in a couple of seating plans so that I could sit with Daniel in a couple of classes, but no such luck, so we had to make do with talking at lunch breaks. That was kinda hard, because one of my friends kept coming up and hugging me and talking to me, despite all my hints which suggested that I wanted to be with Daniel. Grr...she is really nice and all, but sometimes gets on my nerves. We FINALLY got a moment to ourselves right at the end of Lunch 2. We held hands for a bit, walking in the general direction of our next classes (I had Computer Skills, he had Agriculture), but I had to turn a few blocks before he did. :(. I was hoping for a hug or something, because we normally don't see each other after school and that was our last session, but no.

I'm waiting for him to come on MSN, I really wanna talk to him!

I can finally understand what is meant by this:

"Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together" - Marilyn Monroe

Just one last note, not lovey-dovey for once! My friend Tessa moved back! I missed her heaps! We are in most of the same classes now, YAY!

posted by Tegan @ 2:16 AM   0 Comments

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

"This Love Is Difficult

... but it's real"
Or at least, I hope it is.

Listening to: The Way I Loved You by Taylor Swift

Gosh, anyone would think I'm obsessed with Taylor Swift or something xD

"He can't see the smile I'm faking
And my heart's not breaking
Cause I'm not feeling anything at all"
That's about right at the moment. Daniel and his girlfriend broke up. You would think that I would be sad for him, or happy that me and him may have a chance, wouldn't you? Well, you're wrong. I don't feel anything at all. I don't know what it is I feel for Daniel, but it's not love. At least, it's not love the way I love Mitchell. More like love for a best friend, combined with some stupid childish crush. If I'm feeling anything at all, I'm scared. I don't know if I'm even ready for a relationship yet - wait, no, that's a lie. I'm perfectly ready for a boyfriend, I just don't know if I want one. I don't know what to do if Daniel asks me out sometime in the future, because I don't want to agree and then feel all trapped and let him down, because that's what his last girlfriend did, she just told him that she wasn't ready for a boyfriend.
I've got this fear of being tied down, to anyone or anything. I hate rules and regulations which don't let me do my own thing. I'm scared that having a boyfriend could make me lose my sense of independence, and I don't think I could cope with that. Also, if things went badly between us, I don't think our friendship could get back to what it is now, and I can't lose what the two of us share right now.

Anyway, I'll leave you with a happier note :).
Dinner tonight was amazing. I had Potato and Parmesan Gnocci (a type of pasta) with Italian sausage for dinner, and a cheesecake-type thing for dessert. The meal was delicious, and the company was even better! Matthew Pavlich and Paul Haselby (two Fremantle Dockers players, for those who don't know) were there, I had a chat to them and got their autographs! They aren't my fave players but they are still pretty cool. Hase is awesome, really great guy. My mum told me that she heard he's single...
Nah, I think I'm just a bit young to be chasing after footy players (apart from maybe the young ones, some of the Dockers players are only 4 years older than me).

posted by Tegan @ 6:20 AM   0 Comments

Monday, April 20, 2009

"Go and pick out a white dress"

...or in my case, a black and white one.
Listening to: Your Call by Secondhand Serenade


Yeah, got a new dress yesterday - only $10! I think it's pretty, what do you guys think?
I'm wearing it now :). Having my nanna over for a few hours now, and then going for dinner at a hotel owned by a couple of footy players. I've never been there before, but my mum says it's really good... I don't care about the food, I'm just going for the footy players! They are working behind the bar tonight! My aunty thinks I could pass for 18 when I'm dressed up - how old do you think I look in the photo? Not like I could try to get into the bar anyway, not with my family there...
Oh well. Another perfectly good plan spoiled.

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posted by Tegan @ 10:53 PM   0 Comments

White Horse

Listening to: White Horse by Taylor Swift

"I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairytale
I'm not the one you'll sweep off her feet
Lead her up the stairwell
This ain't Hollywood, this is a small town
I was a dreamer before you went and let me down
Now it's too late for you and your white horse
To come around"
These lyrics are amazing - so much emotion, so much power, put into just a few words. True for parts of my life, at least at the moment. For example, me and Mitchell. If I were a princess and we were living a fairytale, I would be the girl of his dreams. Fact is, I'm not. He hasn't let me down, not once, but he has hurt me without meaning to. I used to be a daydreamer, but ever since all this business with him I'm scared to close my eyes, because all I see is images of him and Kristi together. He told me once that if things didn't work out with the two of them that he may consider going out with me, but that wouldn't heal the hurt he has caused me in the past.
Now to explain the meaning of these lyrics to my sister.

posted by Tegan @ 7:05 AM   0 Comments

About Me

Hey!

Thought I should share a bit about me, or some of the some I write isn't going to make any sense. I live for music, writing, friends, family and the great outdoors. Would love to be a best-selling author when I'm older, but would settle for a chef, journalist or forensic scientist. I go four-wheel-driving and camping with my family all the time and I love it. To be honest, I have fun whatever I'm doing - very easily amused.

Here's some of the people I love:
Kristi - Best friends forever gorgeous. Known you since we were 9 and even though we have both changed so much since then, you have always been my number 1 bestie.
Mitchell - iLoveU. You are everything I could ask for - amazing friend, first crush, first love. You mean the world to me, and don't you ever forget it.
Chel - Amazing friend, have been since we met. Smallfry ;)
Hannah - Best sister I could wish for. I take back those words at the hospital when you were born. We don't always get along, but you are absolutely wonderful and I'm lucky to have you. Ducky bunnies!!!
Kylie - Writing buddy :). You and me are gonna be friends forever - take a course in journalism, travel around Aus, become best-sellers together, and then settle down with hot guys (yours Italian, mine Australian), then our kids will be friends ;) ILY NILW (not in lezzo way)
Tessa - Country in our veins baby! I miss you! Next time I'm up your way I'll stop in!
Daniel - Thankyou, thankyou, thankyou for everything. You are an AMAZING friend. Thanks for making yesterday one of the best I've had in a long time
Ryan - Bus buddies :) You're a great friend, can talk to you about absolutely everything
Cydney - My wife :) Amazing artist and writer, you're gonna make it big someday, and I'm gonna be there for you all the way.
Trent, Jess, Jaz, Jess, Beth, Hayley, bella, Tash, Nadia, Intisaar, Holly, Sarah, Amber, Joanna - All amazing friends. We don't always talk, but we have the best fun together and you all have a special place in my heart. ILY!
And that's all, folks ;)

"And I don't know why, but with you I'd dance in a storm in my best dress, fearless"

posted by Tegan @ 4:42 AM   0 Comments

Sunday, April 19, 2009

never want it to fade away...

...the memory of yesterday

Listening to: The Best Day - Taylor Swift

Hey!

Before I get started, suppose I should introduce myself - The name's Tegan, age 14, hails from Australia. Please don't ask about the blog name, very long story which I may share with you all later. Or then again, maybe I won't.

Nothing much has happened today (at least, nothing worth writing about), so I'll start with yesterday. I went 4-wheel-driving with my family (Mum, Dad, little bro and little sis). It was fantastic as always, had a great time! Teased one of the guys about denting his car, kept us entertained all day!! Last night was even better! There's this guy at school, Daniel - one of my best friends who I'm sort of crushing on. He told me that he sort of likes me!

Maybe my luck, love-wise at least, isn't as bad as I thought it was...

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posted by Tegan @ 7:02 PM   0 Comments